our boss is your boss because he was in the right place at the right time...
He knew people you don't know...
When times were better...
When times were easier...
Before social media...
Before AI...
It's just nepotism...
And the good-ol'-boy network...
He hasn't done an honest day's work this century...
So why should I?
He says, "Our people are our greatest asset."
He says, "We're family."
I say PROVE IT, A-hole, by giving me a raise.
Yes, I'm under quota...
But whose fault is that?
Not mine!
Our training sucks.
Our roadmap sucks.
HR sucks.
Tech support sucks.
Our SMEs suck.
Our coffee sucks.
Our sales enablement sucks.
Our CRM sucks.
Our marketing team sucks.
Our leads suck.
So he should give me a raise just for sticking around this sh!thole.
Right?
RIGHT?
I can't believe I even need to say this.
He should give me raises every day I show up to this clown show.
I'm gonna take a personal day.
I'm just not up for anything strenuous today.
Be sure to press real hard...the third copy's yours.
Market like you mean it.
Now go sell something.